Surface-level Dating
Shallow, guarded conversations while dating
Example
are you seeing him again?
i’m not sure. it felt like surface-level dating
ike just small talk?
yeah. we talked for two hours and said nothing real
The type of question a surface-level dater would ask
Related Slang
| Endgame | A couple that is meant to be together |
| Crush | A person who is the object of someone's affection |
| Cuffing season | The fall and winter time period where people begin relationships |
| Love bombing | Bombarding someone with acts of adoration |
| Rizz | Charisma |
| Date ladder | A person you date to make yourself seem more desirable |
| Green flag | A sign of approval |
| Beige flag | An odd but unproblematic trait |
| Red flag | A warning sign |
| Deep dating | Early emotional honesty in dating |
Take the pop culture acronym challenge
Surface-level dating is when a person keeps conversations shallow, overly polished, or emotionally guarded as they get to know someone. Instead of discussing values, fears, or long-term goals, the focus stays on safe topics, such as jobs, hobbies, favorite shows, and light banter.
The phrase grew in popularity in the 2010s and early 2020s as conversations about dating culture expanded on social media, podcasts, and relationship blogs. It emerged alongside terms like “deep dating,” reflecting a broader push toward emotional openness and intentional connection. Millennials and Gen Z often use the term critically, describing connections that feel pleasant but lack depth or authenticity.