Caspering
Ending a relationship in a friendly, but confusing way
Example
Jill was caspering Pete so he finally DM'd her and she came clean about getting back together with her ex
Caspering may seem nice but can be cruel
Related Slang
| Ghosting | Leaving without saying goodbye |
| Fizzling | Letting lack of effort end a relationship |
| Haunting | Following a romantic partner on social media after abruptly leaving them |
| Orbiting | Following someone on social media without direct interaction |
| Zombieing | Returning to someone you left abruptly and acting like you mutually ended it |
| Irish goodbye | Leaving without saying goodbye |
| French exit | Leaving without saying goodbye |
| Benching | Using a person as a backup date |
| Breadcrumbing | Leading someone on romantically |
| Submarining | Dating a person, disappearing, then reappearing |
| Stashing | Dating a person but unwilling to publicly acknowledge it |
| Roaching | Secretly dating many romantic partners at the same time |
| Facestalking | Looking through someone's pictures on Facebook |
How well do you know your texting slang?
Caspering is when a person attempts to end a relationship but is too friendly, which leads to confusion and prolongs the break-up. The term comes from Casper, the friendly cartoon ghost.
Where did caspering come from?
Caspering has been performed for years, but it wasn't until 2019 that it was labeled as such by a "HelloGiggles" article written by Gabi Conti. The trend is a friendlier version of "ghosting" that typically ends up being crueler.
When someone ghosts a person after dating them, they vanish like a ghost without a proper conclusion to the relationship. Although this is difficult for the ghosted person to experience, they at least know the ghoster's intentions.
What does caspering look like?
With caspering, the person breaking up is too nice to break up and instead leads on the person and confuses them. They may take longer to reply to messages, make plans but not follow through, and avoid conversations about the relationship's future.
They know they want to be done with the relationship, but they want to avoid discussing it. But they also don't want to ghost the other person. This approach messes with the mind of the caspered individual because they don't the state of the relationship and how to proceed with all of the mixed signals.
How to stop caspering
The best way to stop caspering is to be honest and clear with your partner about your intentions for the relationship. If you cannot get clarity or a commitment from them, it's time to move on.